Naja, ich bin wieder da.
Sorry for writing this all in English when this is predominantly a German-speaking forum, but I know I'll just embarrass myself if I try writing this all in German. 
I did have an account here once before, but I was never particularly active and when I decided to return here, found myself unable to login since I'd lost both the password and the associated e-mail address many moons ago . . . well, this can be a nice fresh start.
Introduction and my past experiences
I'm from England, but I've lived in several other countries, and currently live in Geneva, Switzerland. I'm 22 years old, a student, and on the outside, quite a plain, ordinary person. This very average exterior contains no real hints as to what dark fantasies are running through my head. My PG-13 hobbies and interests include Northern Renaissance art, modernist art, computer programming (especially data-mining and web applications), antiques, old telephones and gramophones, and reading in general. So all quite safe, ordinary, even "nerdy" interests . . .
. . . then we come to my interest in scat. At this point in time I no longer recall exactly when I became so interested in scat, but I know I started watching lots of scat porn (starting with plain EFRO videos) when I was around 16. I'd experimented with scat before then, of course, but thought that I was just crazy and that there couldn't possibly be other people like me in the world!
My earliest memory of scat-related play was taking a shit in the garden when I was around six years old, where no one could see me. I only did it once then, but for some reason, I found it fun, exciting. I was already starting to enjoy shit then.
The next scat-related play I remember is having a series of very intense smearing sessions when I was around ten years old. I'd lock the bathroom door, and take a shit in my hands, then smear it all over my groin and my cock. I don't think I was masturbating yet at this age, so I don't know if I made the mental connection yet between smearing the shit all over myself and the intense excitement I was feeling.
After that, I forgot about scat for a long time — until I discovered scat porn online, perhaps by accident after searching for watersports videos. I knew immediately that this was the fetish for me, and it was what I really wanted to do and experience. It felt so natural and arousing to think about and masturbate to, and around this time, when I was 16/17, I started having fairly regular scat-sessions by myself, which usually just involved me taking a shit either in my hands and smearing it all over my cock while I masturbated, or shitting into an old pair of tight boxer-briefs, feeling the warm shit squishing and squelching between my ass-cheeks.
For the next few years after this, I only really fantasized about the thought of women shitting in their panties or else smearing their shit on their bodies — but when I was around 18 or 19, I started to become more interested in the thought of actually tasting and eating shit. It felt like a natural progression, the next step for me.
This, then, is what led to my first scat-session with another person. I was 19 at the time, and decided to treat myself by finally living out my fantasy — to lay beneath a squatting woman and have her warm shit fill my mouth. Rather than risking complete social alienation/suicide by asking a girlfriend to do it, I chose to see a professional escort in Berlin for my first time. It was a wonderful session, with lots of facesitting and dirty rimming, but unfortunately I'd lost some of my arousal by the time it came to her actually shitting in my mouth due to anxiety, so I wasn't able to chew or swallow her shit. After she left, however, I masturbated and had an amazing orgasm while sniffing and licking some of her shit.
About a year later, I got a new girlfriend who was very sexually experimental, and seemed keen to try out whatever I suggested. This was good news for me, since I needed someone open-minded. Very open-minded. It took a while for me to reveal the full extent of my fetish to her, and I went slowly on purpose to acclimatise her to the idea of it. We first started out with dirty rimming, i.e. me licking her asshole as she sat on my face. After that, she progressed to allowing me to finger her asshole. I would feel the beautiful lumps of soft shit inside her asshole as I masturbated with the other hand, then I'd pull my finger out and smear whatever shit came out with it around her asshole, which I'd then lick clean. We also engaged in watersports. However, we never quite went the entire way — she was a bit shy and was never able to completely shit on me. Still, we had some beautiful experiences together, and those experiences only further solidified my interest in scat.
Since breaking up with that girlfriend a year ago, though, I've had no other scat-sessions with other people. I never told my most recent girlfriend anything about it.
My main hope now for the future is to taste a lot more shit, and to eventually be able to chew and swallow an entire load of a woman's shit. I'm also interested in experimenting with shit-exchange, i.e. pumping a woman's shit into my ass and then shitting it out, but that's admittedly a bit extreme, even for me. I've given up on the idea of banishing this fetish from my life. To do so would just cause me too much pain, and why should I give up this fetish when I'm not hurting anyone in engaging in it? It makes me feel great — that's what it all comes down to. To deny our own sexual temptations is to deny what makes us human.
What is it about scat that I love specifically?
Physicality
Scat, to me, is one of the most raw, most visceral fetishes imaginable. It is extremely physical in its overpowering attack on all of our senses. Firstly, the aesthetic element — the palette of healthy, earthy shades of gold, bronze, and copper which can cover a body. In this sense, a human body becomes a canvas for an absurd abstract expressionist painting, painted with its own produce in these autumnal hues. The soft crackling sounds of shit being pushed out of an asshole, the grunts and groans of the person, the farts rattling the air. The inviting warmth of the shit, the sticky texture as it clings to your skin in large clumps. Above all, the smell and the taste. Intense and obscene room-filling aromas that assault our nostrils, and the taste which varies so wildly from person to person, day to day, but almost always with the same rich flavours of expensive dark chocolate.
Taboo
This is maybe the critical feature of the fetish, without which I probably wouldn't have had an interest in scat at all. In person, I've always followed the rules. I'm very neat, prefer minimalism in all areas, and clean everything on a regular basis, including the house and myself. So, to let go by indulging in this absurd and obscene fetish, I awaken the locked-away parts of my consciousness, and binge on the filth of it all, mentally and physically.
Masochism
This is the part of the fetish which, for me, I've always struggled the most to understand. Why is it exactly that I can only fantasize about a woman taking a shit on me and not a man, despite being bisexual? Why precisely do I want her shit in my mouth, and not the other way around? Lately I've been thinking about the early images of witches in art, about how witches were depicted as these nude, dirty, cruel creatures of unbridled sexuality and eroticism huddled around a cauldron on a dark mountainside, privy to no societal expectations. I found it arousing, and think I could draw a link from that fantasy to my scat fetish — inversion of social norms, and the sudden and violent display of female sexuality in its filthiest form.
If you're still reading by this point, then I must say thank you very much. I'm very glad that this forum still exists, and I'm looking forward to chatting with you all in the threads. Hopefully my German won't be so absolutely terrible that you won't be able to understand what I'm saying. 
Friendly regards,
Eadwig
